Letters to him
by flufflebooty
Summary: BEING DELETED AND REWRITTEN.
1. Silver and Cold

**A/N-ZOMG! ZEMYXXXX XD haha i love this couple and you guys are gonna hate me for some of the events that are gonna happen. but i hope you love it all the same. Its gonna be sad,funny,joyful at many times.Also I was gonna make it a one-shot but decided to make it a two-shot or a three-shot(would that be what i could call it? idk.**

**-Letters To Him-**

**A Zemyx Story**

**Summary:-2 or 3-shot. Demyx Finds letters layoung around Zexion's apartment after his death. Zexion wrote them for Demyx yet never intended for him to view them. Yaoi.Zemyx**

**Disclaimer: Dont own It beliongs to the bastards at disney && Square enix who refuse to trade it for pocky...come on who does love pocky. AFI also doesnt belong to me...but i wish Jade did...**

_**Chapter One:**_

_**Discovery**_

-Demyx's POV-

I walk into the apartment,HIS apartment,after his funeral. I wish this didnt happen. this isnt what today was supposed to be. it was supposed to be our anniversary...Not his burial.

I look in his bedroom and walk in,holding back the tears. I look at the bed. and recall several moments.Whether intimate or..just funny. We would talk a lot. I brought out a side of him no one knew. A talkative side. A social side. A emotional side.I loved him...I wish he was here

I walk into his closet,pull out a box. 'Demyx' it read. "HEY! thats me!"I say out loud. I pick up the first piece of paper and unfold it.

To:Demyx 07/10/05

I dont know why I'm writing this,you probaly won't ever read it.Unless I die before you,I hope not.I dont know what you would do. Today's Six months. I'm about to go see you after I write this letter. Surprise you with a really nice and expensive dinner. I hope you like it. I don't think I've ever been so happy with someone,ever,Nor this comfortable. You see a side of me I don't show to other people.You just bring it out. Probaly because of your hyperness. It's so adorable.

I really dont think I've ever said this to anyone before Demyx,But, I love you. I always will, I promise. I will always be with you. Never leave you alone. I want you to know that. Even if my body isnt here. My soul and my heart will be with you always(not literalaly my heart...)

The great thing about loving you,is i know you love me too,and it's amazing,your such a wonderful person. How you chose someone like me is above my head.but it doesnt matter. Your still amazing in every way.****Wow. I don't think I even talk to you like this. It's strange. It must be love. It has to be.

Well,Your probaly getting worried so I have to go.If I'm late you'll later on know why.

I love you,

Zexion

P.S...I rememeber the night we met..the song that was on..it was Silver && cold by A.F.I...

I still love that quote 'Your sins into me,Oh my beautiful one, Your sins into me,oh oh,As a raptourus voice escapes I will travel in prayer,and I'll beg for forgiveness,Your sins into,Your sins into me,Oh my beautiful one'

I will always dedicate that quote to you.

-----

Oh..my..god. I never knew he felt so strongly.Shit. I'm getting the paper wet with my tears.Wow. I miss him so much. I still love him,I always will. No one can EVER replace his place in my heart,As he said he will always be with me,no matter what I know it. Thats why..I love him so much.

-Fin-

A/N: Do you hate me yet? Please say no. I know Its sad to see zexion dead. but still it just randomly popped into my head. Well i hope you like it. More,DemyxXZexion memories when we return in chapter 2 XD oh and i know i always promise this,but it WILL be longer...

PLEASE REVIEWWW


	2. 1 year

**A/N THANK YOU TO ALL MY REVIEWERSS I LOVE YOU ALL! ...just to let you know this chapter is gonna be so sad **

**Letters To Him**

**Chapter 2: 1 year **

-Demyx POV-

I sat at his grave. The box with my name on it in my hands.I sit down. Look at all the flowers. Zexion...You were so loved. You just never realized. I mean..only Half those flowers are mine. I open the box. pick up another letter.

"To Demyx 1/10/06

Today's one year. I can't believe it You told me at the beginning of our relationship that your relationships usually don't last very long. I said the same thing. I guess we both beat our own statistics, No one gets our relationship. Most of them think its wrong for 2 men to love each other. Or they think we're too different. Well I say screw them. Because I love you. and I always will. No matter what.

Last week I gave you one of your presents early. The promise rings. I remember your expression "ooohhhh pretty...what is this?" with a adorable confused look on your face. It was so cute. Is it me or do i express my feeling more in writing? You always say I'm an excellent writer. That's what drives me to write so much. Is your words.I'm sorry this letter is so short. I'm running late. I have to go pick up your last present.

I love you,

Zexion

P.S I hope you'll love the gift."

Gift...what gift? OH. Yea. It was my new sitar. I love that sitar so much...I pick up another letter

"To Demyx 2/16/06

This is really just a random letter. You're at work right now and I'm sitting in my apartment. How come we never move in together? I always wonder that. Hmm. Maybe its because we cant afford a apartment good for 2 people to live in. Both of ours are so small. But I love yours. It just smells of you everywhere. I love that scent. It smells so good. We always have a funny argument about who smells better. You always win. Even though I'm still convinced you smell better. Oh. Its 10. I have to go pick you up.

I love you,

Zexion 3

P.S I found a song perfect for us. I caught Fire(in your eyes) by the used. I love that song. You made me listen to you. Even though I hated the used."

I'm now crying. and laughing thinking about those arguments. I would always win with my pout. That's what he said. wow. It's still hard to believe he's gone...I just still can't imagine life without him.even though im living life without him.

**A/N. I promised a longer chapter. And i believe this is longer. I'm thinking of making a sequel. Taking place during their relationship. What do you think? Please review! if you do I'll give you the box full of letters!**

**Next Chapter: **

**Chapter 3:The Final Goodbye.**

**Yep. the last chapter. There will be 2 letters. and a flashback to the day Zexion died.**

**-Raine Mizuki**


	3. BreatheThe Final Goodbye

**A/N: this chapter is gonna be sad. BUT NOT CENTERING FORMAT YAY. oh. and the reason for my grammar is i never have time to check it. and my beta isnt doing so well.so if anyone wants to be my beta go right ahead and tell me.**

**This is gonna be the final chapter but i will have the prequel up as soon as possible. whole chapter in Demyx's POV**

**Disclaimer:Don't Own. Wish I did. But I don't**

**Warning:boyxboy love. dying. heartbreak. Saddness. Demyx Crying.All of the before-mentioned occur in this chapter**

**Letters To Him**

**Chapter 3:**

**BreatheThe Final Goodbye.**

"To:Demyx 5/16/06

Hello Demyx. I'm so sorry. I never meant to say those things, I swear. I love you Demyx. I just started freaking out because of what happened and yea...I'm sorry. I've never really yelled before. I can't beleive when I finally do,its mean things directed towards you. I'm so so so sorry. Please forgive me. Your not a stupid loser. Your not a whore. None of those things. Your kind,smart,loyal..and most of all your mine, And im so lucky. Please come back. I don't even where you are. Today. Ha,this is the anniversary of when we actually first started dating in 2004. I didn't realize it. You probaly didn't either. I'm so glad we got back together though. I do not know what I would do without you... I love you Demyx. I hope you know that

x3 I love you,And always will,

-Zexion"

I remember that fight...He randomly thought i was cheating on him. That hurt me so bad. I would never cheat on him no matter what.Ever. I won't now. Even though he is gone. I love him too much for that. And I did realize it was the anniversary. Of course I did. I fell in love with him from the moment I saw him. His beautiful features...I pick up the next and last letter.

"To Demyx 7/10/06

Demyx, 1 year six months ago today I asked you out again after our fall-out in 2004. and I'm glad I did. I'm so happy,and you know me, I'm not usually happy. You've helped me go through so many things. My father's death. The return of my ex. So many things. You always make me smile. and it's...amazing to know i have someone like you in my life. I have to be the happiest person alive I swear. I love you Demyx. With all that I have. I love you. I give my life to you. Now,Time to go pick you up for our dinner...

x3 I love you,

Zexion."

I started shaking. No. No. No. He..he wrote this letter the day he died...that day..it just haunts me like a ghost...

-Flashback-

There Was a knock at the door. It had to be Zexion. How did i know? Well, I told everyone I knew if they came overtoday id kill them. I'm not violent. I just love Zexion and Today was an important day for us.

I answer the door and glomp the person in front of me, the love of my life,Zexion. "Gahh Get offa me"he said.

"But Zexyyyyy" I whine and get off.

"I have a headache. Sorry." He gave me a hug and a kiss on the forehead"

"Its okay!"I smiled and looked into his eyes. He looked sick,That worries me.

"Zexion...is everything okay?"I asked him

He looked at me and smiled "I'm fine."

"Zexion! You can't hide the fact your lying from me."He grabbed my hand

"Come on" he said and started walking.

-10 minutes later-

We were sitting in our favorite cafe eating and talking. He still didnt tell me what was wrong. He seemed even more emotionless than normal. we walked out of the cafe'

"Zexion...please tell me whats wrong."I said desprate for an answer

"Demyx...I'm sick..."He said. I hada confused look on my face

"Like a cold? we can fix that Zexy!"I said happily

"No..Demyx...I..I have cancer..and its too far along..I might not have too long to live."he said trembling

I felt my heart drop. I felt it come out of my body and roll around on the floor "what? what do you mean? Zexion...y-y-you can't leave me. You Can't."

He grabbed my hand and squeezed it "I'm sorry Demyx...I don't want it to be true." It was silent.I could hear someone listening to music listen to music on their head phones as we were walking behind them.

**_2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,  
"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,  
I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season"  
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes  
Like they have any right at all to criticize,Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason  
_**

I look at him. Stare deeply into his eyes. "I love you..."

_**  
'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable  
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table  
No one can find the rewind button, girl.  
So cradle your head in your hands  
And breathe... just breathe,  
Oh breathe, just breathe  
**_

He smiled. "I love you too...I always will Demyx"

_**  
May he turn 21 on the base at Fort Bliss  
"Just a day" he said down to the flask in his fist,  
"Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year."  
Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,  
But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,  
Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.  
**_

He leans in closer and kisses me.

_**  
Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,  
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table.  
No one can find the rewind button, boys,  
So cradle your head in your hands,  
And breathe... just breathe,  
Oh breathe, just breathe **_

Being the little school girl I tend to act like,I blushed.**__**

There's a light at each end of this tunnel,  
You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out  
And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again  
If you only try turning around. 

I wrapped my arms around him in attempt to deepen the kiss**__**

2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song  
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,  
Threatening the life it belongs to  
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd  
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud  
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to  


Suddenly His body went limp.

_**  
But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,  
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table  
No one can find the rewind button now  
Sing it if you understand.  
and breathe, just breathe  
woah breathe, just breathe,  
**_

"Zexion?!?!" I nearly yelled as my knees gave out. I held him in my arms  
"SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULANCE!" I yelled this time tears in my eyes. "Zexy...please..please don't go...I l-love you."  
People now gathered around the body of the man I love,and myself. They keep asking "what Happened" Over and Over And Over. Just SHUT THEM Up.

The ambulance arrived. The take his body away from me after some struggling. "No...no dont take him!"I yelled

"Listen kid. We need to take him..you can ride if you need too"

-30 minutes later-

_Beep Beep Beep_

While listening to the steady beats of his heart through that machine, I find myself doing something I never do. Praying. I'm praying that he'll be okay...  
Suddenly The beeps get faster. I press the emergancy button and the doctors come rushing in.  
After poking and proding and other doctory things. The beeps get very slow.

"He's almost gone...you should say your last words now..."The head doctor said looking at me

"Can I be alone?"I ask

"yes,you may."

I look at him. I grab hold of his hand "I just want to tell you one more time. I love you.I'll forever miss you. and I will never forget you. You'll always be my one and only. and will always be watching over me. I know it. I want you to know I will never forget the memories we shared this last18 months...I love you." I gave him a quick kiss

The beeps stop.

His breathing stops.

My life..stops.

Again. All I hear is the last few words of that song...

_**Oh breathe, just breathe,  
Oh breathe, just breathe. **_

_**-Fin-**_

**A/N- And that is the final chapter. the prequel will be up tommorrow.**

**Please review - and that is it. I hope you liked this story,.**


	4. Chapter 5

Hey :]

I know this story is completed, but it is in the process of being rewritten, I have grown up a lot since then; and I think it is a good thing to do, I don't want the shittiness of this story to be on my repuation XD There may be some bigish changes, or I might not even reupload it.

but, this will be deleted in a week or so, and the first chapter of the rewrite will be up soon after. Just put me on your watch if you want.

Most my old stories will be reuploaded as well, and a few other stories may be in the process, probably mostly one shots.

Thank you for watching this,

but for now, it's being redided.


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